Sunday, October 02, 2005

channeling debbie downer

Okay, I give up. I just realized that I dilly-dally and don't post anything for days when there are no comments on my previous post. I suppose I am trying unconsciously to punish you, the reader(s): "Nothing to say, hmm? Then I've nothing to say either!" (pronounced "EYE-ther," of course.)

Is anyone out there terrified of the avian flu, which has been predicted to mutate into a human virus and cause a pandemic on a scale never seen before? I am. Or I was, until last night on SNL Debbie Downer mentioned it. If you haven't seen that skit, find a clip online right now. BWah-bwahhhh! Anyway, Ben has pointed out that my social skills bear a slight resemblance to Deb's, so I have been trying to cut down on the fear-mongering. Here are a few examples from actual conversations:

Scene 1: A recent dinner party we attended

Cute surfer boy guest: I went surfing at Pine Trees yesterday and caught some killer waves, dude. [Or something like that]

Missymussy: Did you hear that a developer bought Pine Trees and is turning it into an exclusive resort? [ignoring frowns of dismay] Yeah, construction is starting next month. I guess there won't be much surfing happening there soon.

Wah, Wahhhhhhh.

Scene 2: At dinner with the couple who threw the previous dinner party

Waitress: And our fresh catches tonight are ahi and opa.

Male companion: Mmmm, I'm getting the ahi.

Missymussy: Huh. I try to limit my ahi consumption to twice a month, as suggested by the FDA. Those fish are chock-full of heavy metals and can cause mercury poisoning, which mimics, perhaps even causes, Alzheimer's.

Luckily for the fate of our evening, I went over that one in my head, and decided not to say it. But boy, did I think it.

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